What happens after you have been diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer can depend on who you are and what your life was like before your diagnosis. Every person’s circumstances are different. Some people choose to make big changes in their lives. Others find it comforting to have day-to-day life continue much as before.
Many people find the uncertainty of their situation one of the most difficult aspects to manage. Some cope best by living in the present and not thinking too much about the future. Others find that planning ahead gives them a greater sense of control. The only right approach is the one that works best for you.
There is more to life than cancer. Initially I felt as if I was in shock, later I experienced grief and loss. I have moved from that stage. Now my diagnosis is part of my life. Treatment is part of my life. To date it has not been so bad.
Some people choose to make drastic changes to their diet after a diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer. There is no scientific evidence that people with metastatic breast cancer need a special diet, or that a particular diet can make a difference to your long-term prognosis. However, a healthy, balanced diet can help you to feel your best. When you feel well enough to eat, try to include foods from all five food groups in your diet:
bread, cereal, rice, pasta, noodles
milk, yoghurt, cheese
meat, fish, poultry, eggs, nuts, legumes
Some regular light exercise, such as walking, swimming or gardening, can also help to manage symptoms and side effects by:
increasing energy levels
reducing fatigue, pain, nausea and vomiting
improving strength and flexibility and the functioning of your heart and lungs.
Swimming or walking in a warm pool can help with joint pain.
Nutrition combined with meditation, living in a stress-free environment, daily walking and deep breathing are all sound ingredients that I have comfortably woven into my lifestyle.
Having metastatic breast cancer poses some challenges and it can be emotionally exhausting. There is no rule on how to manage emotions. You have to listen to what your heart says is right for you – and that can change over time.
Being able to talk about emotions is helpful. Sometimes talking to family members and friends is the best way to handle your feelings. However, it’s hard sometimes to share dark thoughts with them, or talk about ‘what if?’ Talking to someone outside your family and friends, such as a trained counsellor, can be a great relief.
You don’t have to protect a counsellor from things that are worrying you. They won’t criticise or trivialise your concerns. Most of all, they will listen and won’t compete with you by telling you about their own problems.
Some GPs have specialist training in counselling. If not, your GP will be able to refer you to a psychologist, social worker or other trained therapist. You may also be eligible for a Medicare rebate for counselling.
Talk to your GP about this if you think a number of sessions may be helpful for you.
There’s only so much you can talk about with friends and family – you don’t want to overburden them. It was a relief to see a psychologist – I really appreciated her honesty. Friends and family can’t be honest in a way that a stranger can be.
With so much going on in your life, it’s good to remember that it is okay to take some time for yourself and do things that you want to do. You may like to write a list of all the things you enjoy, big and small, so that if you have some time on your hands or are feeling down, you can refer to your list for inspiration.
It is also important to listen to your body and take time to rest when you need to.
Do what you need to do to feel better. I used to drive out to the mountains and just sit and take in the view or have a coffee in a little coffee shop.
Let yourself have the occasional ‘doona day’. You will reap the rewards.
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Visit My Journey, BCNA’s online tool for information tailored to your diagnosis. My Journey has a Symptom Tracking tool that you can use to help you record your pain, what works for you and what doesn’t.
Join our Online Network if you think that talking to others online and sharing experiences will help.
Contact BCNA’s Helpline on 1800 500 258 between 9.00 am to 5.00 pm AEST Monday to Friday, for information about the services and support that may be available for you and your family.
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