No wonder my nerves are shot.
I wonder what is going on with The Universe up there - hello - are you listening to me???
I just got a phone call from Radiology at the hospital and the anaesthesist is not available tomorrow for my portacath insertion - instead it will be done at 8.00am Wednesday, from recovery I will be wheeled into the Cancer unit to have my chemotherapy...
Great - just recovering from anaesthetic and then to be greeted with the chemo. I will definitely be there all day - I will need my partner to be waiting for me. I hope he is up to it...
I just spent the morning psyching myself up for tomorrow, now a delay - I will truly be a bundle of nerves by Wednesday.
Oh well, no pre-meds either...just have to grin and bear it and hope for the best.
Comments
Sounds Dodgy
Hi Sandy,
Sounds dodgy to me. I had to wait 1 week for my Portacath to heal before they would do my chemo. I would be double checking what they plan to do. Especially, no pre meds. Get a second opinion. It's your body you dont have to be treated like that.
If they dont get it right the chemo will leak into your chest and that is not what you want or need. I have a port and it was put in place by a surgeon under general anethetics. I went home after they were happy it was in the right place and not leaking.
Take care and be assertive.
Chrissy D :) xoxoxo HUGS
I agree
I had a general anaesthetic to have my "penny" portocath inserted. I stayed overnight in hospital - had a huge bleed in the area and had this compressed. Very ugly. The next morning I had chemo. Too soon too soon. Speak up and say "whoooo up". Stay strong and do as you feel is right. XLeonie
My surgeon would not let me start chemo without at least a weeks break from surgery, I am confused as to why they are taking this path but I am not the surgeon or your doctor so asking a lot of questions should be number 1 on your agenda!
In finishing I love my PORT and dont know why everyone hasn't had one espc. if you have to do Herceptin or longer chemo.
Good luck and ask all those questions until the answers sound right to you! Cheers Cheryl
taking it one day at a time
Thanks ladies for your warnings.
I am taking it one day at a time. I am thoroughly confused at what I have been told and your experiences. Another friend of mine says it is the best thing to happen!
I didn't think it was that big a deal, as many people have their port inserted under local anaesthetic and then they are right to go.
I am a little confused as to having it done the same day as the chemo - there were not anaesthesists available for today, otherwise I would have had it done today and then the chemo tomorrow.
Will let you all know what happens later in the week.
Cheerio
Sandy xxx
Hi Sandy Iam sorry to hear what happend to you , hope you got well with the port insertion and chemo . I had my chemo unexpectatly as well as someone cancelled and they called me , but was OK cause they gave me IV Dexamethasone and Phenergan to conteract the side effects. Hope you well . Take care ,Mariana xxx
How are you feeling??
Hi Mariana,
I was so anxious yesterday. it is like a blurr. I eventually came to the Chemo ward at around 3.00 ish..I remember looking at the clock and it was 3.45. I thought they couldn't do it for me then, surely. It would be too late then...I was still groggy from the anaethetic and the antinausea that they pumped into me in recovery. I felt nauseas from it all.
Then Dianna and Amanda gave me some sandwiches which I could not eat and some apple juice. The best I had was some water - and even that kept repeating on me! It was all an awful day filled with calamities at home and there.
I am sorry I went for the chemo now...I may change my mind yet, however I have this thing in me and there is a tube in my neck which is uncomfortable that no one told me about.
Sorry, I am venting out my anguish on you.
I hope you are doing well with your sudden Chemo - they were very busy yesterday. Was it then? Probably. Anyway, I asked Phamilla to book me into the Look Good Feel Better for 26th September and there is another lady who will be there - the one I told you about that I met with the group. If you had your chemo, you probably didn't make it to the group either.
No matter...I am going to reschedule my chemo for next week now as I am all in a lather and not doing anyone any good - including myself. I need time to "come down" and recup from this ordeal.
Stay positive and let me know how you feel. I found this great meditation from the cancer council website - it is about relaxing and meditation. Try breathing through your stomach instead of your chest. It helped me all day yesterday just to get through. So there must be something in it. It is done by a professional in the health care and is the best answer I have found yet for anxiety. I have heard many of them, I can tell you!
Take care and look after you. I am sure your wonderful hubby and daughter will be there for you, as my partner is there for me.
Sandy xxx
I am sorry to hear of all the truble you been thru , one thing is for sure it can only get better from now on. I feel ok no nausea or vomiting , I'm keeping my fingers cross that it will last . I feel very sleepy and weak today probably because the dexamethasone is out of my system and I was awake at 0345 this mane. So I am taking plenty of rest and naps before I'll start cooking dinner. Hope you getting better and will be ok wit chemo . No I did not make it to the meeting with the suport group because I had a meeting with Professor Delayny for my radiation treatment. My hubby and my daughter are very supporting and carring they not allowing me to do anything , I feel useless but what can I do I just need to conserve my energy to cope with chemo, so that's what I am going to do. I am glad that you booked into that feel good look good workshop I'll bring my daughter with me that dday cause she'll be on holidays, hopefully I feel good enogh to be there as it will be after my second lots of chemo. See you for now I need to go back to my napp I feel my batery draining. Mariana xx
Nap Rests
Hello Mariana,
I am so happy that you are okay with little nausea. Please do yourself a favour and allow your hubby and daughter to do what ever they can/willing to do to help you. My partner is my rock and is there at every step I make. Without him, I would have been totally lost. He does molly coddle me a bit too much sometimes, so I just tell him to unwrap me and let me out of my cocoon. Otherwise he is great. I am grateful for him being there. Especially if I don't have to look at food when I don't feel like it. (I get the nervous nausea sometimes badly)
I won't make it to the look good feel good as that is the day of my second chemo! I have my first one on MOnday - finally - and the jitters to go with it. Still, it will be over in four sessions! Do some breathing exercises, and don't forget to make use of the physio's if you think you need them as they are really great too and can help you with some different exercises that may help your movement.
Take care and look after yourself. I am getting there and will be okay. I know that. I just need an elephant gun to shoot the bl...y butterflies in my tummy!!! :))
Sandy xxx
Hi Sandy, hope you went well with your chemo. I been a bit tired and having headache for the last few days and did not have a chance to go on line. Today feeling better no headaches but I stopped taking maxalon and that seem to do the trick. I have to have mashed food cose i developed a dry tongue and found that the mouth wash and tooth paste samples they gave us helps a lot with it, the only disapointing thing is that I can not have coffee and I missed that a lot. My hubby and my daughter help me a lot soo that great. Once again take it easy relax and you will be good . I am sorry that you can not make it to look good feel good , I hope that I could make it as well as my next chemo is on 20 september. Cheers Mariana xx
Look good feel better is on!!!:)
Hi Mariana,
I am soo happy to have my first chemo under my belt. I was soo disapppointed about not going - I told Pharmila that I could not make it, but she said to post pone the chemo to 1.00pm. I have had so much trouble with postponements, that I thought I shouldn't. But then talked to Rhonda - the chemo sister and she said - come in on Monday for the bloods early, then you go off to the L.G.F.B. course and have a great time, then come and do the chemo later. She is WONDERFUL. So I txted Pharmila urgently not to cancel me - which she hadn't got round to and voila!!! I now can come along! So that will be great. My partner may come with me though as he will be dropping me off in the morning and then staying with me for the chemo.
I will see how I go. I am a little tired now - been a long day. Though I was out by 12.30 so was feeling quite good. Is just half hour on one, then an hour with hands on ice for the other. After that, all done. They can get access to the port for my bloods and all going well, will be fine for the chemo. Yes, I know about the coffee - I relented and had a white chocolate at home today and a cake was feeling soo good. Am trying to keep in good hygene and everything else. Using the mouth wash is good too. I will be painting my nails red now as I have found my good nail polish. the nail hardner they give us is really good - use it on your toe nails as well. Perhaps you can have a mother daughter nail varnish weekend. That is always fun.
Don't forget to pamper yourself too. That is always necessary. I am going to have my epson salts bath tomorrow morning and then go to the wig library in the afternoon. May even post a picture of myself with my "new look" here. Let me know when you start losing yours - they say by the second week it usually goes. I have enough scarves/shawls to make some head wraps anyway.
Take care and look forward to the day anyway. Good luck with your next one 20th - will put that in my diary to think about you then. Cheerio for now
Sandy xxx
relaxation
Hi Sandycee,
You do sound like you have been through a lot in a short time, poor sweetie. I have combed ebay and bought some relaxation cd's which make me lie down and take it easy for a while. I have also got the ones from the cancer council, but personally I prefer the ambient ones such as rainforest sounds etc.
Julia
meditation
Hi Julia,
Yes, I know what you mean. I work in the industry actually, so have lots of cds and resources that way. I just needed something extra which helps ME to relax and doesn't give me an alternative like "detoxing" or "healing".
Just to plain - RELAX. I found the one on the cancer site to be good and really helped with my relaxing. Our breath is so important and now I realise I have been doing it all wrong to get too hyper. So am learning to unwind, relax, and can actually see and think with more clarity then.
However I am certain I will get over it all and may even be able to laugh at all the faux pas that have happened on this journey of a life-time that I wish upon no other living/dead soul.
Take care
Sandy xx