I was on holidays at the end of April 2006 when my boss phoned me - she was going to another position and wanted me to act in her role. I said yes - enjoyed the rest of my holiday and before going back to work, I had an appointment at the Women's Health Clinic for a bi-yearly pap smear. The doctor was very thorough and insisted on doing a breast examination. She found a lump. I wasn't too worried, I was only 39. She sent me off for further tests and throughout the myriad of tests, I returned to work acting in my boss's role.
For the next couple of weeks, I went to work. On the day my results came back, I left work at midday. My husband Chris came with me (he works for the same organisation as me). As soon as I saw the doctor's face, I knew that it wasn't good news, Chris and I looked at each other and tears were rolling down both our faces. The doctor was amazing and phoned through to a couple of surgeons to get me the quickest appointment possible.
I was a mess that afternoon. I went and had a few drinks, while Chris went back into work to advise my manager that I wouldn't be in - unsure for how long, but he would keep them informed. My manager and Chris' manager were initially the only people we told at work.
It seemed that every day, I was off for more tests - it was such a blur. My surgeon had a great sense of humour and when I raised concerns about telling people at work, he suggested that I tell them that I had a really horrible vaginal infection - he guaranteed that there would be no more questions!! I needed to tell my work mates something soon - I was starting to receive "get well cards" from some and they thought it was stress related (sort of true, I suppose). I drafted a letter to advise what was happening and what was going to happen, and Chris took it to work and gave it to my manager to advise all the staff.
After my surgery I came home to find that my workmates had put together a huge basket of goodies - including the ugliest bright pink wig I have ever seen! I had a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy - the tumour was about 1.6cm and it hadn't spread to my lymph glands - chemo and radiotherapy were recommended.
Work was fantastic; my immediate work colleagues and management were understanding and enormously flexible. The HR area was great and answered all my questions about returning to work and various options. Luckily as well I'm not the type to take sick leave at the drop of a hat so I had plenty of leave available. Chris' work colleagues and management were also fabulous, allowing him to have whatever time off he needed and to leave at the drop of a hat to come to me if needed. Every day, Chris came home from work with best wishes and copies of emails for me to read from both my work team and his.
Chris came to all my chemo sessions, which were on a Friday. I would recover on the weekend and go back to work on Monday or Tuesday and it worked well. My hair started falling out, so I got the clippers and Chris took off all my hair on a Sunday. On Monday, I went to work wearing a scarf, I sat in my office and one of our staff members walked by and looked in, as soon as she saw me, I burst into tears (so stupid of me, but I was really self-conscious - I used to have long hair) - she came in, gave me a hug and told me how beautiful I was. She went back to her work area and must have told the other staff that I was a bit fragile that day, because I started receiving emails of encouragement from staff all day. Throughout my treatments and after, other staff members would lift up my scarf to see how my "fuzz" was progressing - it was a lot easier to handle, by having fun and laughing about it and all staff were able to be relaxed around me.
I wasn't once sick and worked through the entire time until after my fifth chemo session. I hit a brick wall. I was getting ready for work and was putting my makeup on. My eyebrows & eyelashes were very thin and I just couldn't apply my makeup properly - I felt ugly. I threw myself on the bed and cried and cried for hours, I couldn't stop. I had to do something, so I phoned Chris at work and asked him for the Employee Assistance Scheme (EAS) number (this is an employee incentive which provides free counseling services to staff members and their families). I phoned them and they were fantastic. They organised an appointment with a local psychologist who I went to see on four occasions totally free of charge. As a result of this, I approached my Manager and worked half days until my chemo treatment had finished and I felt up to coming back full time. There was no pressure at all.
Throughout the radiotherapy, I came and went as I needed.
My work was absolutely fantastic to both myself and Chris and still is. There was no pressure, only full support from staff and management. I can only thank each and every one of them. I still have appointments to go to every few months or so, and the same support and flexibility is still there - no questions asked. I am very lucky! Last year, on Pink Ribbon day, my workmates assisted me in raising over $500.00.
If there is one thing I will say to anyone who is working and going through this - Remember to love and pamper yourself - "Take time out for YOU"!
--Denise
