My father died of cancer when I was 12. My brother died of cancer when I was 42. All around us, my father's siblings either died of cancer or survived it. I never thought it would happen again in my family. But it did.
Last year, at the age of 47, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My four children just fell apart. But I am a survivor and kept on saying to myself that I HAVE to survive, to grow old with my kids. I know what it is like to grow up without a parent. I know what it did to my niece and nephew. My daughter was only eight at the time and kept saying 'Who's going to do my hair, mum?'
I had my mastectomy in May 2006. The kids came to see me that night and I made sure that I was awake, sitting up with a smile. All I had to say to them was, 'You see, I made it through!' That was it. I made it through.
The kids were fine from then on because I had overcome the first hurdle. I even went to school two days later, still with the drain in me, to pick up my daughter. The staff were amazed.
Eight weeks later I had my ovaries removed and went along to the parent/teacher interviews two days after! I just had to be there for my boys. The message again was strong and clear. I will survive. Two weeks later, I was back in hospital because they thought I had lung cancer and I needed a mediastinal procedure. When I got home, my tax was due so I went into town to visit my accountant. Again, I told myself to be strong and to keep things as normal as possible. Six weeks later, I was back at work teaching my Kindergarten class. Again, be strong, positive and keep the kids feeling safe.
My class of 2006 - the children and their parents - kept me going. I was determined to return to work and I did. Looking into their eyes and feeling their warmth, along with their cards and notes, their flowers and phone calls, and the meals that were delivered after my first operation - these were all so inspirational to me. In a world so troubled, it's easy for people to forget the importance of love. But they didn't, and stood by me and gave me the strength to carry on. I remember everything that was done for me. These children and their parents have restored my faith in human nature.
Now it's July 2007 and I've just had my other breast removed, and again I'm back at work.
My daughter has been the one who has washed my prosthesis, which she named 'Squidgy'. She isn't scared of the term, cancer. She is strong.
I'm having my kidney monitored because of the history of renal cancer in my family. I still have hurdles to overcome. I don't know what the future holds for me. But I have to set the groundwork for a positive, happy and hopeful future for myself and my family - and also the kids I teach. We have to protect our children from some of the sadness related to cancer but also give them a positive attitude to life.
--Katina
