I was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer (IBC) in early October 2007. I had just celebrated my 50th birthday in August, with a wonderful party surrounded by my family and friends at a seaside resort called Sorrento.
My life dramatically changed when I noticed a swelling along my collar bone and my breast became red, swollen, feverish and painful. I thought it was hormonal and it would just go away. Within a couple of days a hard lump developed which felt like a rock just under my nipple. I saw my GP the next day and from there on my life became a roller coaster ride of appointments and tests.
My husband John was with me on the day of the diagnosis and we both looked at each other and felt our whole world had fallen apart. The immense sadness, anger and fear were gripping. What made it worse, there is very little information or support for IBC in Australia. I felt very isolated and had no one to talk to about it. Many people think there is one type of breast cancer and it was exhausting trying to explain it. Most of the information I received was through the Internet, and the Inflammatory Breast Cancer Support Group in the USA. They have a fabulous website and I corresponded with many women via email who were also going through treatment for IBC. I still get their daily emails and often am filled with sadness when I hear that someone has passed on.
My treatment regimen was six rounds of chemo to begin with … FEC and Taxotere. My tumors were HER2 positive and Herceptin was introduced when I was taking Taxotere. My immune system crashed during the chemo and I had to be given an injection of Neulasta into my stomach the following day which caused severe bone pain for several days afterwards. I had beautiful long hair which was gone within weeks after the chemo. It was an onslaught on my physical being and I felt like I was being gradually erased away. I was angry when people would make flippant comments like ‘it's only hair’ and ‘only a breast’. My hair and breast were part of who I was, part of my femininity and self-identity.
In March 2008 I had a radical modified mastectomy, followed by a right breast reduction in March 2009 and left breast reconstruction in December 2009. It is wonderful to not be lopsided and to feel a sense of balance once again.
I remained optimistic during the treatment. I kept on saying to myself this is not going to defeat me. I would visualise that I would come through all of this and be able to share my journey with other women, those who are going through breast cancer treatment and those who are not. It is so important to educate women that there is more than one type of breast cancer. Cancer is indiscriminate and can affect anyone at any time. I was determined that I would survive.
I am taking back my life and living it to its fullest. I don’t think I will ever be the same person …. cancer makes you see things differently. Now I am able to return to work I want to do something I am passionate about. I was always passionate about my dancing and research. My dancing was helping women recover from family violence though movement and creative expression. I have always been committed to and passionate about helping women empower themselves. Women going through cancer need love, support and encouragement to help them through the treatment regimen. Their families also need to be in the picture as they hurt alongside their loved one. My survival has also driven me to pursue an awareness project relating to IBC.
Upon reflection, this all seems like a distant memory and at times it is amazing what the human body and spirit can endure. I am a survivor and now I can look at myself and embrace the woman that I am.
-- Sandra
